A map of desire

I have noticed that throughout my journey in life I had a lot of desires. A lot of aspirations and goals. I will write them down as I remember them:

2000-2006. In my teenage years all I wanted was to leave Estonia and study in the US.

2006. I wanted to get into college to study as a Psychologist.

2007. I got into college. I wanted to “have” a girlfriend. I did not want to do anything related with computers in college.

2008-2009. I tried a computer science course and loved it. I wanted to study Computer Science.

2010-2011. I did not want to have the drama of the relationship. I just wanted to play video games with my buddy Spencer.

2011. I quite Psychology because it was too impersonal (too much mathematics), I finished my Computer Science degree.

2011. I wanted to find a job in programming. I found a job after 6 months of searching.

2012. I wanted to become a great developer. I did not want to be in a relationship anymore.

2013. I ended my relationship. I wanted to travel.

2014-2015. I traveled a lot.

2015. I became an even better developer than I imagined. I wanted to understand the meaning of life.

2016. I grasped the meaning of life partly. I wanted to leave the US on March 17th, 2017 and move to Taiwan to study Mandarin and Tea. I also wanted to work remotely.

2017. I moved out of the US and started working remotely. I studied Mandarin and about tea.

2018. I do not want to study tea or Mandarin. I want to be a monk to put a stop to all this wanting.

My want is to visit my family and friends for possibly the last time. To close all my accounts and donate my money. Think of it as my 2018 year resolution.

I advise you to not focus on my map though, create your own map to understand “You”.

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